The Story Behind the Name

I have a super common name.

My name was #1 for the decade of the 80's and it spent many years as either the #1 or #2 spot between 1980 and 1990.

I hate this.

From the age group of roughly 25-35 there are a whole hell of a lot of Jessica's.

Of course my parents didn't know this would happen at the time.

There are not a lot of Jessica's very much older than me.

It was not a popular name before the late 1970s and I was born in 1981.

Luckily they had the wherewithal to make it unique in it's spelling if not in it's pronunciation.

Ok, that's not why there is only one 's' at all.

It had nothing to do with me and letting me have a common name with a unique spelling.

There's a story behind my name.

And I've always liked it.

My name does in fact have only one 's', Jesica is not a lame attempt to be anonymous, that's my real name and the real spelling.

The story goes like this.

I am the middle child of 3 girls.

All of our first names start with the letter J.

And have 6 letters.

See, if I was the first child maybe we would of all had 7 letters in our names ;-)

But no, 2nd child means somehow they had to make Jessica have 6 letters, so I lost an S.

But it gets better.

Our middle names all start with L.

And have 4 letters.

And when you put the initials together, JLB it stands for my parents names.

J is the first letter of my dad's first name.

L is the first letter of my mom's first name.

And B, well we all have the same last name, duh.

Had any of us been boys the letters would have stayed the same, but the numbers were going to be flip flopped, so the first boy name they had picked out and never got to use was JOEL.

Cute, no?

Common name I may have, but I have a story behind the unusual spelling of the very common name.  So when people ask me "why is there only one 's'?"  Which happens often because they always think it's just spelled wrong, I have a cute story to tell them.

And people are always impressed that there's actually a story.

I've thought long and hard about doing this with my own children.  But since we all have J names I didn't want to add any more to the mix, there's a LOT of J names in my family and D for my husband's name, well....I'm not a fan of very many D names.

In fact I can't think of a single D name, boy or girl that I would consider.

So, what's a girl to do?

I'd like my kid to have a story behind their name.  But you can't just INVENT a story.  Stories have to happen organically.

As you can see, we're still stumped when it comes to the name of our future little terror.  I say terror because I'm pretty sure god has a sense of humor and this kid is going to be a Leo...just to fuck with me.

And out of nowhere, I just now remember a dream I had last night.

I had a boy baby.  And we named him my maiden name as his first name.

That would totally solve all of our problems wouldn't it.

Hmmmm......did my story just happen?

Bumpdate - 22 Weeks

I just have to say that the 2nd trimester is going along WAY quicker than the 1st.  It's possible that this is because I did the first trimester twice...back to back...but NEVERTHELESS, 2nd trimester is quickly going by me!

This week has been an extremely uneventful week in pregnancy land.

I almost feel like I have nothing to write...but here goes, let's see what comes out.

How far along:  22 weeks

Weight Gain: The scale says I've gained 3 lbs this week...which means I'm up 14 lbs.  Funny thing about midwife care vs. OB care is that they don't really care about your weight through your pregnancy as long as toward the end you haven't gained too much.  So, they asked for my weight at my first appt and then so far they've never asked again...I just like weighing myself from day to day =)  I imagine when we come to the latter part of the pregnancy they will once again ask me just to make sure I haven't gained like 50 lbs. but generally weight is not a huge concern for them from week to week.  I wholeheartedly agree with this and the fact that I gained 3 lbs this week?  I'm pretty sure this week is a growth spurt for baby as I will discuss below!

Maternity Clothes:  Bain of my existence!  To finish my rant, not only are maternity dresses giant huge tents that swallow me whole, they are also too long!  I am not short, I'm 5'5", you know...average, but these dresses, ALL of these dresses (we're talking at least 10 that I ordered) hit me either right at the knee or just below the knee, this is an UGLY length (at least on me).  Dresses should be either ankle length or hit about an inch above the knee.  Why oh why just because I'm pregnant do we think that I need LONGER dresses?  These are not mini skirts, above the knee is still a perfectly acceptable length even while pregnant OLD NAVY!  Ok, rant over.

In good maternity clothes news there is an adorable boutique maternity store near me that I finally walked in and tried some shit on.  MUCH BETTER.  But horribly expensive.  So I walked away with exactly 1 dress that cost half as much as the 20 items I just sent back to Old Navy combined.....but damn it's cute.

Movement: Baby is all over the place these days.  Sometimes I feel little baby kicks WAY down in my crotch, and sometimes I feel them WAY up behind my belly button.  It feels like he has a whole hell of a lot of room in there and really enjoying all the space!

I must admit that even though the movement helps a LOT with easing my worries about the baby spontaneously dying, sometimes I still freak out.  There are times when I'm like OMG when did I last feel baby movements?!  Or, OMG I haven't felt STRONG baby movements in awhile!  Luckily if I eat something and lay down (and sometimes if I poke him ;-) baby will start dancing and I can quit worrying...for that day, or a few days.

What I miss: Honestly I miss enjoying a glass of wine like I used to.  I'm not against ordering a glass of wine and sipping on it at dinner, but I just don't ENJOY wine the same way I used to pre-pregnancy.  But other than that I don't miss much.  Guys, I'm a huge fan of being pregnant.  If I can I will totally do this again.

What's up with my body: I think I'm about to have a huge growth spurt as the last two days I've been REALLY tired and REALLY hungry.  I've been going to bed at 9pm!  And still tired all day long, desperate for it to be bedtime again.  I also had one of those FEED ME NOW moments after my Italian class yesterday.  I had already had 2 breakfasts, lunch and a snack and it was 3:30pm but I NEEDED to eat.  Since I was coming from downtown on the train and suddenly I HAD TO EAT NOW I hopped off the train at Safeway and stuffed my face with a Safeway burrito!  Totally disgusting and unhealthy but I was desperate...and it was delicious.

And heartburn, heartburn is back this week.  I was up twice last night to chew on some Tums.  I HATE this symptom of pregnancy almost as much as I hate the constipation.  WHICH IS UNDER CONTROL THIS WEEK BTW!

What's up with Baby:  Oh, this picture really freaked me out today.  I can feel the baby if I push on my uterus, baby is hard, uterus is squishy, but the parts of the baby that I can feel make it feel SMALL, so when I saw this:

source

I was like DAMN, that's a big baby!  And yet it's barely a pound....I'm so used to the baby being so much smaller than what I imagine it to be that this new baby being bigger than my imagination is totally fucking with me.  

Birth, the thought of birth is looming now.  Big baby through small opening....

Gender: Stuck on girl for now!

Bumpdate:  I've got a full on maternity outfit for you today, maternity jeans AND maternity tank top =)  Husband is gone so this is what you get!

And would you look at that?  Turns out I had WAY more to write than I thought.

Some Updates

I decided I owe you guys a few updates.

I wrote about a few things that I feel you need to know how they turned out.

Is this pretending you care more than you do?

Probably.

Nevertheless, updates you shall have.

1. Italiano - As suspected my class is full of old men.  Why did I think that an Italian class would be full of old men and why is my Italian class full of old men?  Both good questions.  I have no idea.  So, there's 4 old men (with Italian last names, maybe they decided they can't die without seeing the land of their ancestors?) 1 older lady and 1 older guy.

Old means over 50 and older means over 40 =)

So, no bueno on making friends UNTIL this past Tuesday, my 3rd class we had a brand new student....AND she's young, married and pretty!  Now I just have to figure out if she's cool...we have 5 more weeks to become friends.

On the Italian leaning front you'll all be happy to hear I'm like totally the best in my class.  Guess that's what $500 spent on Rosetta Stone gets you, Italian I is review.  Awesome.

2. Fried Chicken - My fried chicken turned out pretty damn good I must say.  It needed WAY more seasoning than I used and I think buttermilk is probably a better egg wash than egg and water but the craving is gone and it was tasty.  I would say first fried chicken attempt = success!

3. My assload of maternity clothes that I finally splurged on at Old Navy.  Well, they arrived.  I tried them on.  And they went immediately back in their package and sent back to Old Navy.

I'm officially running out of clothes to wear now.  I seem to be in clothing limbo land.

I have two problems.  One is that my bump is too big for the majority of my regular clothes.  Two is that my bump is too SMALL for the majority of maternity clothes.

Seriously Old Navy, I bought everything in XS, the top part of the dresses fit fine even over the giant boobs and then just under the boobs the dresses would just TENT!!!!!  SO MUCH EXTRA FABRIC that I look like I've been swallowed by a mumu.  Why, WHY?  I JUST NEED A LITTLE EXTRA ROOM IN THE BELLY.  I do not need yards upon yards of fabric.

I think they should make different stages of maternity clothes, like 1, 2 and 3 because while it's possible that I may fit into some of these clothes that I just sent back sometime toward the end of my pregnancy, the fact is that I need clothes to fit me NOW, not just at the end.

So, here I am in maternity limbo.  With nothing to wear.

And that's it for me today.

I hope everyone had a fantastic Easter weekend and had an extra day off work.

My family came down for a quick visit and my weekend of being a tourist has left me EXHAUSTED today.

I'll be on the couch if you need me.

Prenatal Yoga

I'm lazy when it comes to exercise.

I don't like exercise.

And I've always been skinny so exercise has never been a "necessity" for me.  One can argue exercise is a necessity for everyone, but I don't lead a very sedentary life...I walk everywhere, so technically I AM exercising regularly.  I just don't enjoy shall we say...regimented exercise?  I hate putting gym clothes on and GOING somewhere to do exercise.

But I do enjoy yoga.

SF has some phenomenal prenatal yoga classes...or so I've heard.

It's a hippie city and I think it's a proven fact that hippies love yoga.

Why is that btw?  Why do hippies love yoga?  Because of the spiritual nature of it?

Also, yoga is supposed to be EXCELLENT for you during pregnancy and can help a lot with childbirth...especially DRUG FREE childbirth, which is what we're aiming for over here.

I've been meaning to sign up for prenatal yoga since I hit 12 weeks with the FIRST PREGNANCY.

Yes, since September I've had EVER INTENTION of doing prenatal yoga.

But here I am 21 weeks into a 2nd pregnancy and I STILL haven't signed up for a single prenatal yoga class.

Boo on me.

I'm fairly certain this would be an ideal place to find my young hot pregnant married friends I am so desperate for because you know...who else would be at prenatal yoga?

And yet I hesitate.

So, a cry for help, MOTIVATE ME LADIES!

Have any of you tried prenatal yoga?  Was it the most amazing experience of your life?  Did you meet your friend soulmate there and you went on to have millions of babies all the same age together?

And if it you gave it a whirl and it was the worst experience of your life, DON'T TELL ME, I do not need another reason to NOT go...I'm doing really good at that all by myself.

Bumpdate - 21 Weeks

I had a midwife appt on Monday and all is well, feels like forever since I've had an appt and when I looked at a calendar I realized I went 5 weeks between appts!

Holey moley.

AND at this appt we started talking about BIRTH!  Like, OMG BIRTH!  Apparently it's about time to sign up for childbirth classes!

Eek!

So, here we go.

How far along: 21 weeks

Weight Gain: 1 more pound this week, 11 lbs total.

Maternity Clothes: I had an amusing moment today when I dug my FAT jeans out of the closet to start painting the nursery.  THE FAT JEANS almost don't fit!  Luckily it's totally because of the bulging belly and little else, but still FUNNY SHIT to think that the fat jeans don't fit right now.  And I officially can't wear A LOT of my regular clothes now.  Unless my dresses are empire waist or baby doll dresses, it's a NO GO.  And I may or may not have just bought a shit ton of Old Navy maternity online yesterday that is due to arrive this week.

Movement: Outside baby kicks!  Dom finally felt the baby kick for the first time this week, it's funny to feel it from both the inside and the outside at the same time.  I am liking baby kicks WAY more these days as they get stronger, much better than those weird fluttery feelings from the first week or two!  AND I have started to feel them even when I'm not sitting down.  I can now feel them when I'm up and about!

What's up with my body:  Still fighting the good fight against constipation.  I can get it under control for a week and then BAM out of nowhere I'm knocked on my ass and spend three days horribly uncomfortable.  Then all back to normal again for another week.  It has occurred to me that perhaps my terrible weekend eating is affecting my digestion more than I realize as the weekends are the only time we eat food that is not cooked by one one us and the constipation has a tendency to hit at the beginning of the week, you know, just after the weekend.  Hmmm...I could either fix this and quit eating crap once a week or... accept that once a week constipation is as good as it's gonna get.

My low, low, low abdomen, down in my pelvic girdle has been terrible crampy and sore.  It hurts when my bladder is full, when my intestines are full or when I move my legs up toward my chest like to put on shoes. Midwife says it's just muscles stretching and to get used to it!

No heartburn this week.  This is definitely a come and go symptom that I'm so glad is gone more than not.

The bump has grown enough that it is making certain things uncomfortable, getting up out of bed at night is becoming cumbersome, especially if I'm facing toward the middle of the bed.  There's a lot of grunting.

Peeing is becoming more difficult as I can't quite seem to empty my bladder completely anymore because my uterus is pushing it into a funny position.  So even if I have just peed I have to pee 5 minutes later.  And without fail if I leave the house, the moment I get out of my car or just far enough by foot that it's not worth it to turn around I HAVE TO PEE RIGHT NOW!!!  Even if I just peed before I left the house, somedays I feel like it's just not worth it to leave!

and...

I ALMOST FELL OVER.

I was in Home Depot buying paint (for the nursery, eek!) and I dropped a receipt out of my purse.  I bent over FORWARD to pick it up and nearly went toppling head over heels.  Bend at the knees Jesica, bend at the knees...it's more ladylike anyway.

I have also hit the bump with a door when I was standing too close to the door when I opened it, not allowing for my own girth.  And Dom ran into my bump as he tried to squeeze past me and didn't allow for the girth.  Oh what fun it is to be way wider than you're used to!

AND

My boob leaked.

WHAT?!  Did you know this happens this early?

I was in the shower, looked down and one boob has milk just streaming out of it.  I wiped it away just to have it come right back.  Wiped it away a second time and it was all over.

SO WEIRD.

But wouldn't you know it my weekly pregnancy update did in fact mention boob leakage at 21 weeks, so it seems this DOES happen this early.

Midwife says it means good things for milk supply.  Excellent.

What I'm Looking Forward To:  Viability is just 3 weeks away now!

Best Moment of the Week: Outside Baby Kicks.

Worst Moment of the Week: It dawned on me today as I look at how big my belly looks in pictures that this little one is not even a pound yet and most babies are between 7 and 8 lbs. That means my baby has to get 7X bigger!!!!!!!!  Frightening to think just how big the belly is really gonna get!

Gender: After seeing me my sister has firmly stated that it's a girl.  I do not look like I'm carrying a basketball under my shirt, my bump is much more spread out.  Also her heart rate theory has been proved RIGHT again as a friend of mine found out the sex of her baby with a heart rate of 160 and sure enough, it's a boy.  Mine is once again in the 130s.

Bumpdate:

The Birthdays

Everyone take this post in the lighthearted, jovial manner in which it is intended because I'm sure you're all aware I will take this kid GLADLY whatever day it arrived on and that this is not an ACTUAL concern of mine, just mildly entertaining for me.


Also, take all the astrology talk with a grain of salt.  Lighthearted and fun people, lighthearted and fun.

Without further ado I present to you.....

The Great Astrological Conundrum of 2012

At least in this household.

This baby is due 2 days after my own birthday.

My birthday is August 13th.

If you don't know your astrology, that makes me a Leo.

Leo means I LOVE my birthday, in fact I love any celebration centered around ME.

The month of August has always been MY birthday month as I do not share August with any member of my family.

Unsurprisingly August is my favorite month.

August was mine.

I love August.

I'm ALSO a middle child.

Leo, middle child, I got a double dose of attention whore in me.

But the middle child part notwithstanding, if baby comes anywhere near his/her due date, baby will be an attention whore too.

AND NEITHER OF US WILL WANT TO SHARE BIRTHDAY TIME.

I realize as the mother that I should give up my own selfish needs and wants and concentrate on celebrating my kid.  Give the kid the birthday month of August and GIVE IT UP WOMAN.

But the Leo in me is screaming in protest.

The only true solution to this is the kid needs to be born a week, week and a half LATE, so that it will be a VIRGO and not a Leo.

Virgo's are not nearly so obsessed with their birthdays.  They won't mind sharing August because they won't be a Leo.   And me, well I will share August if I don't have to share being a Leo.

A 2 Leo household?  I shudder at the thought.

There is a reason I don't have any Leo friends.  Leos work best in any situation when they are the only one.  Otherwise the competition for attention can just get out of hand.

It's not pretty.

Especially when you add my husband the Cancer.

Cancers and Leos work surprisingly well together, even though they are both headstrong, stubborn and a bit attention seeking.  It's an odd mix in the astrological world that no one understands, but it seems the Cancer can somehow reign in the Leo.  I wouldn't actually believe this (who can reign in a free spirited Leo?) but it happened...so 1 point for astrology books everywhere.

But throwing in ANOTHER Leo spells disaster.

Three stubborn, headstrong attention whores all living together under one roof?  The horror of watching your own worst qualities come out in your child and realizing what an ass you probably were to your parents.

The teenage years sound like hell.

Good news is baby was measuring 3 days behind at the anatomy scan, Aug 18 puts us VERY close to Virgo territory guys, very close.

Anyone want to take bets that this kid will not only be a Leo, but will arrive on my birthday?

Anyone else given any thought to their baby's due date and it's astrological significance?

A New Member of the Worst Club Ever

Alexis over at Our Journey Through This Lovely Life lost her baby over the weekend.

Spotting at 12w1d, a trip to the ER, no heartbeat and a baby that quit growing at 8w6d.

Sound familiar?

Yeah, it's my story all over again.

Alexis, you're not alone.

Everyone please go visit her and give her some love as she just became a member of the 

Pregnancy Loss Club that none of signed up for and too many of us belong to.