Bumpdate - 34 Weeks

OMG, it's July, We're Having A Baby NEXT MONTH!!!

And we're just 3 weeks away from a fully cooked baby...that's insane!

I'm kind of in shock.

So at 34 weeks I have 2 words for you:

Constipation + Hemorrhoids

My new version of hell.

Pizza is my new enemy.

Never. Eating. Pizza. Again.

Ok, I'm being overly dramatic.

But only slightly.

I will in fact never eat pizza again during this pregnancy, we're done with that.

And.

Constipation + Hemorrhoids really is a terrible terrible combination and I am once again thankful that these are pregnancy specific problems for me and not something I deal with on a regular basis.

PLEASE GOD LET THEM GO AWAY AFTER I HAVE THIS BABY.

Both problems are resolved at present.

But there were definitely some uncomfortable moments this week.

Enough about hemorrhoids, on to the bumpdate.

How far along: 34 Weeks

Weight Gain: Up another pound, 20 lbs total.

What's Up With My Body:  Didn't we already talk about this?  Constipation and Hemorrhoids!  Other than that I have only minor complaints.  I get the sciatica in my left butt cheek into the tailbone every once in awhile, my back between my shoulder blades hurts every once in awhile, I have heartburn every once in awhile and I get shooting pains down my crotch every once in awhile, which my midwives call "fire crotch"...awesome, but it's nothing compared to the CONSTIPATION AND HEMORRHOIDS COMBO. I'm still pretty comfortable, no swelling, I'm not feeling huge, no stretch marks other than the boob one, no itchy belly.  My feet do hurt if I'm on them too long and I find myself waddling if I've been walking too much, but no hip or pelvic pain yet.

Sleep: Sleep has been exactly the same since Day 1 of this pregnancy.  I get up 3-4 times a night to pee, every single night.  I don't remember what it's like to sleep through the night BUT I have yet to experience "pregnancy insomnia" as I am always able to fall back to sleep. Generally I'm not in pain at night and rolling over is still easy enough that I don't feel the need to complain about it.

AMUSING STORY ABOUT SLEEP - Both my cats started puking at 3:30am last night.  I became convinced that there was a carbon monoxide leak because I've heard stories about there being a leak and the doggies getting up, throwing up and then going back to bed with their owners and then the owners AND the doggies die from carbon monoxide poisoning.  We were all up until 5:30am, all the lights in the house were on, windows were opened, us on the computers, us checking our co2 leak detector, us thinking we were nauseous, etc etc.  Finally we decided we were being ridiculous as I am pregnant and get nauseous sometimes and he had had a whooping cough vaccine that day which side effect can be...nausea...and the cats?  Well, the cats are inside/outside cats, maybe they ate something?  Ultimately as you can tell, we are alive and the cats are alive and I don't think there's a co2 leak in the house BUT we just stocked up on MORE co2 leak detectors...just in case.  This morning it felt like this was a prelude to parenthood...up. all. night. with pukey babies, worried sick....awesome.

Bumpdate:

Apparently I was feeling patriotic today as I got up and put on a red and white dress and wore a blue jean jacket with it.  I didn't even notice my 4th of July outfit until one of the neighbors commented on it.  This is my one and only Old Navy Maternity dress and I actually had to tie the empire waist tie differently than it's intended to make it fit me properly.  So. Much. Extra. Fabric in such weird places on Old Navy Maternity I honestly don't know who they're intended for...but it's not me.