Christmas Came Early For Us

Just when I was ready to write 2011 off as a total bust, it had one last little surprise for us.

Just 2 weeks before Christmas, I got my 2nd one of these:

On the heels of my anonymity post, and the one time I've wished this blog was anonymous, if you know me in real life PLEASE keep this information to yourselves.

I am 7 weeks, 5 days and considering what happened last time it is WAY too early for me to be spreading this news to the general public.

But out of respect for all of you who helped me through my darkest times and have been my sisters in this shithole of infertility I needed you all to know.

Also, 1 week from today marks the day that Baby A's heart stopped beating.  I have found a way to make peace with whatever the outcome of this pregnancy may be, but from now until my scan at 10 weeks will be the most anxious-ridden time for me and I know I will look to you ladies for some comfort, support and words of encouragement.

This year was still a shitty, shitty year, but it left one last little glimmer of hope and I can only pray that 2012 will follow through and bring us the joy that 2011 so cruelly took away.

And on to Christmas

Thanksgiving is over.

Bring on Christmas.

I am so ready for 2012 I would skip Christmas all together if it would bring about the end of 2011 just a day sooner.

But since it won't, I AM ALL OVER CHRISTMAS.

Cards are written, addressed and stamped.

Presents have been bought.

Decorations are up.

Tree is...ok we don't have a tree yet...but soon, very soon we will have a tree.

I even sent out present ideas for myself and my husband to my family.

I AM SO ON TOP OF IT THIS YEAR.

Come on Christmas, I AM READY FOR YOU!

Generally speaking I'm not really a do it ahead of time kind of girl.  I'm more of a procrastinate until the last possible second kind of girl.

Or even a shit I forgot to buy you a present I'll get it to you later kind of girl.

Or damnit it's Christmas tomorrow and we don't have a tree up kind of girl.

And the husband, well he's the same.  Procrastinator to the end.

But not this year, this year is different.  This year I am ahead of schedule.  I am ready.

READY FOR THE END OF THE YEAR.

And since Christmas brings us one step closer to 2012, let's do this thing!

Just a Bit of Complaining

I should just make this a travel blog because it seems like that's ALL we do...I'm not bragging and I don't mean that in a good way. Seriously, Jesica wants to come home now and stay in one spot for awhile, that's right I want to SIT STILL. I used to think there was nothing greater than traveling and seeing the world, and while I still believe that it's also nice to have a HOME. I don't even know where home is anymore.

Of course you can say home is "where the heart is" and as long as we're together I guess we're home. But seriously that's movie hallmark stuff. We both need doctors for a few things that we've got going on and it sucks to have to jump from one doc to another because you're always moving cities.

Next year is already all over the place, first we have to live in Oregon for a few months while our renters take their sweet ass time about moving out of our San Francisco house. Then we have to get all of our stuff from our storage unit in New York to our house in San Francisco, just to put it all back in a storage unit in San Francisco when remodel time comes, then back up to Oregon for the rest of the year while San Francisco house gets remodeled.

AND to top it all off I'm in a foreign country for Christmas, a country where you're supposed to go to the beach on Christmas and IT'S GOING TO RAIN ON CHRISTMAS, or so the weather man says. I find that depressing.

Speaking of Christmas, I want this:

Scratch-off wall map from FLIGHT 001 on Vimeo.

I figure we could put it up in our office of our San Fran house and only scratch off the places we've been together...how cute would that be?!

Merry Christmas everyone! Hope you all have a wonderful holiday!